My "ah ha" moment... Sorry Oprah!

Good Evening,

Kids are in bed, hubby just ran to the store, dishes are staring me in the face and my belly is full from dinner and I don't want to do a thing! Let me guess, you have been here too. Who hasn't right. I am curious that if my inspiration to work on things around the house or comment on other Mom's blogs is slightly strange? I ask only because my hubby tends to roll his eyes when I show him all the marvels I have found on blogs! I mean it is amazing! Somewhat overwhelming and my anxiety kicks in, because hey, I am not creating anything fabulous, I do not have a million followers, or attend conventions on blogging (had no idea that occurred)... I have seen THE most adorable jewelry items, camera strap covers, Mom's that have homes decorated to the nine (but with items they made in their spare time?)... Yet here I sit. Looking around... I have a few items i grabbed at the thrift store with hopes to dress up and make a fau mantel (ya I said fau).. side note but my vocabulary has taken notes and I have thousands of new words to describe my home, family, and self! Thanks ladies!

Anywho, where was I... Oh ya, trying to think what in God's name would give me an edge or a topic or a photo op? Still thinking on that one, but its funny.. A friend of mine recently left facebook (like its a relationship, but seriously it almost is) and she started a blog. Her whole blog centers around the idea that its 365 days without a facebook! (Seriously check her out, http://amomwithoutfacebook.blogspot.com/) Great idea right, it made me a reader or sorry...Follower. I have found that interesting as it seems that facebook satisfy that voyeuristic quality in me that just wants to know what else is going on in the world of my friends and families. I thought it was great to see what they were up to, look at pictures... etc.. i also found it odd that I was sad at times at the things I did read and see. Nothing tragic really, just a blow to my ego from time to time and sometimes I was envious. Now, envious is by no means a quality I would like to inherent. It is a dirty little word with devious outcomes. I found myself in small facebook wars with people about stupid things and all in all, I didn't like the person I was becoming. Now I did not cancel my account and start a blog just like my friend, but she inspired me. Lots of things have... She was the first.

Next I clicked that silly icon that allows you to go to the next blog. Well then I found House of Smith's! OMG... Can I just say that, that woman is freaking AMAZING. If you haven't looked her up, please do! http://www.houseofsmiths.blogspot.com/ ) You will truly be changed if you love great ideas for your home and crafty options to make your house a home! She has give aways and photos....quite honestly I spent a week, AT WORK, looking at this woman's site. I ran home, promptly informed my hubby that we needed shelves and stat (that or a mantel) and that I was going to the thrift store for goodies... You should of seen his face! I also saw many links on other blogs. I mean seriously...you can go on FOREVER! So now, not only have I been inspired to cut the little evils or limit them from my life, but now we have an entire house to remodel! (= Well that is a bit extreme, but you get the picture.

So many other sites I am in love with! Of course, finding that my girlfriends from K-8 have sites, HELLO! So exciting! Ohh there was another site I wanted to mention called Little Miss Momma.. (http://www.littlemissmomma.blogspot.com/ ) So cute.. She is adorable and of course the more I look around the more put together these sites are and mine is the template version.. Goodness I can either hang my head in shame of all the things I am not doing with my spare time, or I can look at it as an inspiration to move forward and add more to my life. After all, these women have children, husbands, they may work or stay at home and do the hardest job possible, lots of possibilities... I look at this as a journey to find my reason for starting this blog in the first place. My first struggle as noted was finding a darn name for the thing. God Lord, really! Do you know how many were "taken".. So  you could imagine my joy of finding one that is "available".. You got it. Jumping up and down, creating it as fast as possible, then calling the closest co-worker to google it and see what she gets. Not kidding folks, I had her screen shot me the image to my email. (=

So what is this post really about, do I have a direction or a purpose...not really, but just that over the past several months I have spent indulging in others lives and wishing it was my own (or at least certain events) Don't get me wrong I LOVE my life and my kids and hubby...Best people EVER! But I think we all fall victim of thinking that other people have it easier, or better, or that we are not that lucky and so on. Know what light bulb literally just turned on in my noggin.. When you do that and think others are better, you are discrediting yourself of all your own personal accomplishments. OK so I don't make gorgeous mantels, wreaths, decorations, invented the coolest multi sweater craft (really there is one, no joke), but I do so many other things and I think what makes me great is the fact that I TRY EVERYTHING..

My brother in law once said to me that he "admires my ability to chase my (see told you I was working on it). I have been able to follow or try or start just about anything I have found remotely interesting. Its like my life is one large bucket list and instead of waiting until I am old and senile I am doing it now! I have gone to school to teach, decided not to do the credential program and only regret it here and there. I have attended beauty school, only to drop out due to a pregnancy (I WAS SOOOO SICK) giving pedicures was not something that was, well...pretty for me! So one day I WILL go back and finish as that is part of my list! I signed up to sell Jewelry to conquer my fear of large groups and speaking.. Talk about hitting the storm head on, I am much better, but time to move on and sell off the remaining items I don't wear; Momma's ready for a new venture! I got an amazing Cannon Rebel for my birthday a year or so ago and started taking pictures of my monkeys; hence the reference to banana's; which they are! It sparked an interest and I thought, wouldn't it be neat to have my own photography business... With that thought Smitten Photography was born!

There are many other moments, but I wont bore you with my jumping from here and there. The point is, it is a great thing to follow what your heart is saying right then and there! I mean really. I didn't see that until recently! Apparently I am learning I am not gun shy, but I am a free spirit looking for my purpose. The one and only purpose I have that stays with me, is that I want to make a difference. Now, that sounds cliche, but it is true in all aspects of my life. I want to move someone to tears with a shot of their child, I want to help a Mom who feels like she is all alone and crazy for having such random thoughts, I want to breathe hope in women who suffer from anxiety and depression that you can over come and live a comfortable life, I want to set an example for my kids that it is utterly important to make the ones you love feel loved. I could go on and on. Overall I guess this is me accepting me for me. Simple right! HA! If only you knew what all happened to get to this! That will be another day and post, but for now, I am content on knowing that I, like all the other women I follow or watch on blogs, have something special to offer as well. Let's just see how far this blog actually goes. Wouldn't it be something if it grew in audience... Just sayin..